Tuesday, July 26, 2016

Gardens Goodbye

The sun is hot and bright. Everything is orange and yellow and green. We didn't plant much this year as we knew we were going to sell the house. I can tell it is not feeling my love as I have had to detach to move on.  We did just eat the peaches off of our tree for the first time. They were good and soft and sweet. Now we are convinced that next time we will plant 5 trees. The kids have grown so much here just like our trees.

We have been dealing with squatting tenants in a house we have tried so hard to move into. In the end we could have gotten it if the attorneys office hadn't botched the job of delivering the ticket to the Sheriffs department. We have had to move on and find something new but we are sad as it is very expensive. After weeks of not having somewhere secure to move into it feels relieving but now I have to mentally move out of our first choice and mentally move into what we are going to get. All this time I tried to comfort myself by saying that the squatting situation saved us a thousand dollars as we didn't have to pay mortgage and rent for the month of July. Now with having to move into something different we will have to pay thousands of dollars more. So much for silver linings.

I am however excited for the new yard. It is large, private and already has a ton of flowers. The owner said we could garden and pretty much do whatever we wanted to make it our home. That was good as I don't want to hate the place I live. I have been thinking of all the ways our new place will be good.

Its been an emotional few weeks and my brain is fried. I have so much to do and I have to really rally up my will to get it done. I am ready to move on and start over. I am ready to find our new rhythm and have a simpler life as I won't have so much to care for being renters and all. I am feeling more at piece with leaving behind my beautiful house and working toward my families long term goals. I am working on a new motto of "I never worry." It seems that no matter what life will throw you a curve ball. Its best to just take it as it comes.

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