At first when I found out I was pregnant I was really upset. Mostly because my last pregnancy was still so fresh. My memories of labor and delivery were so fresh. I couldn't comprehend another nine months of feeling sick and uncomfortable. Now that its has been almost two years of being pregnant I cant really remember what it feels like to be normal. I have the knowledge that I will have more energy and no longer have heartburn but I am having a hard time imagining my life that way.
My official due date is tomorrow and last week I decided that I needed some projects to take my mind off of the waiting and wondering when this baby would come and what the labor would be like this time. I was pleasantly surprised with baby 2 how much easier it was than baby 1 but I am a little nervous about baby 3 for some reason. I decided to finish an old project that has been on the back of my mind since we moved into our house. I did a blog post of it way back when and you can see it here. All I had left to do was the binding and thanks to the internet and Pinterest I was able to find a couple of tutorials on how to do a binding fast and easy. It didn't turn out perfect but it is finished and I am happy.
Here is another project I finished. I got this idea off of Pinterest as well. They are burp clothes. I used some fat quarters that I had lying around from a project I thought I would do almost a year ago but never felt quite right about, and some old towels I had. I was really tempted to use some of my more tattered cloth diapers but decided to go with the towels because I thought they would look better. Normally when I use something for burp clothes I use my infant sized prefolds because they are just so dang adsorbent, but they are not very cute out in public. I am hopeful these will be adsorbent as well. I don't know about you but something can be as cute as it wants but if it doesn't work I will use something that does.
Here is a picture of our back porch It is my staging ground for our home birth. It turns out that you have a lot of stuff to gather to have a baby at home, especially if you are going to have a birth tub. It is nice that we have a room to shove it all in so it doesn't have to take up a corner of our living room.
I am anxious to get this baby out of my body. I am ready to feel and look normal again. I love how right after I have a baby I am so happy to eat. The negative associations that have built up around food for the past nine months immediately go away. Last time we ordered in Indian food and if we can we are going to do it again. It was sooooo good.
I am nervous about what labor will be like and how long it will be. I am nervous about how it will start. Even though I am doing this for the third time I still worry about my water breaking and soaking the bed while I sleep. Deep down I know I can do this at home, in the setting I have chosen surrounded with the people that I know. I know that once it starts it will be ok and I will make it to the other side. Its the anticipation that makes it hard.
I'm going to hope and wonder again if this baby will come tonight.